Eijun the Ultimate Hero
by Akurai
Summary: Wakana gets tired of Eijun's senpai stealing his phone and pretending to be him, and decides to have a little fun with them. The result: Eijun's new teammates start thinking that he's well on the road to becoming the next Chuck Norris. (features troll!Wakana and oblivious!Eijun)


Wakana glared at her phone and the email that had supposedly been sent by Eijun. It was clear at just a glance that one of his senpai stole his phone and was answering his mails again, pretending to be him. That had caused some confusion amongst their old teammates, and a good bit of annoyance, and now that stupid senpai was at it again.

It rubbed Wakana the wrong way how Eijun's senpai were treating him. Even though, as Eijun said, their pasts didn't count for anything at the new school, she and the rest of their old baseball team didn't like how Eijun was being treated with so little regard, picked on, and manipulated by his senpai. Eijun might not be the best pitcher in the world, or the smartest guy in most rooms he walked into, but he was the best friend anyone could ever hope to have, and the most loyal comrade. People like that deserved respect, or at the very least to be treated decently by the people on the receiving end of their friendship and loyalty. But Eijun's senpai kept treating him like their plaything and even went so far as to invade his privacy. It made Wakana want to either make them respect Eijun, or else get back at them for mistreating her friend. Then she realized that it would be more fun to do both.

Smirking, she started typing a reply to Eijun, knowing that his nosy senpai would intercept it.

_ Hello again, Eijun. I hope you're well. Our old team is going on a camping trip this weekend, up to Koreyama Mountain. It won't be the same without you. But don't worry, we'll be careful and keep an eye out for bear traps. And we'll stay together, just in case anyone steps in one, so we'll be right there. It would be horrible if that happened again, and I don't think anyone from our old team but you is tough enough to pry those steel jaws open and then make it all the way down the mountain alone. It still makes me shudder to think of you doing that when you were only eleven. :( _

_ Stay safe and study hard, Eijun, and do your best at practice!_

_ Wakana_

Wakana smiled as she set down her phone after sending the message. Let the senpai chew on that. She wondered if they'd ask Eijun about whether it was true or not, or if they'd be dumb enough to just believe her and not realize they were being trolled. But the best part? Eijun did have a scar on one of his ankles, and he'd gotten it on a camping trip to Koreyama Mountain when he was eleven. It hadn't come from stepping in a steel toothed trap. That had never happened. The scar looked like it could have come from that, however. Eijun had gotten it when he stepped on a stair to their cabin that was rotted only right where he put his foot down. The unrotten wood had gouged his skin around his ankle and above it as his leg sunk through the stairs. It had looked a lot worse than it really was then, and still looked, even now, like it had been very painful at one point, even though the scar was faded enough that it wasn't as noticible.

If they saw that scar, Wakana was pretty sure they'd buy the lie she'd just fed them, even if they asked Eijun about it and he denied it. Because that's what people did. If they didn't exaggerate their exploits, they downplayed them. And they were more likely to believe a wild story over a mundane one.

Now that she thought about it, Wakana realized this could be fun. In fact, this could become a new favorite past time. She and the rest of Eijun's middle school teammates were going to have a great time trolling Eijun's new teammates.

* * *

Kuramochi's was left in disbelief when he finished reading Wakana's email to Sawamura. He read it again just to make sure he was understanding it right. Because while Wakana didn't say it in so many words, it was clear from the context that at age eleven, Sawamura had stepped into a steel-toothed bear trap, then pried the trap open on his own, and walked (or more likely limped or crawled) all the way down a mountain by himself.

"Holy crap, how tough do you have to be to do something like that?" he wondered out loud.

"What?" asked Masako, pausing in midbite of his pudding.

"Here. Look at this," said Kuramochi, and handed over Sawamura's phone. He watched Masako's eyes widen the way he was sure his own did when he realized what Wakana was saying.

"Sawamura-chan is strong. You knew that," said Masako once he finished and gave the phone back to Kuramochi, but he still looked impressed.

* * *

"Hey, Ryou-san. Miyuki. See that scar on Sawamura's ankle?" Kuramochi pointed out as an oblivious Sawamura got out of the bath and wrapped a towel around his waist before walking into the changing area.

"Huh, I never noticed that before," said Miyuki.

"It looks like whatever caused it hurt," commented Ryousuke.

"I take it you know what caused it?" Miyuki asked.

Kuramochi nodded and eagerly began telling the story.

* * *

Haruichi was curious. He couldn't help it. He knew what he was about to ask was really rude, but he had to know if what he overheard his brother telling some of the other senpai was true.

"Eijun-kun?"

"What's up, Harucchi?" asked Eijun with his usual cheerful smile.

"I'm sorry, but do you mind if I ask . . . how you got that scar on your ankle?"

"Wow, that's random."

"I'm sorry. I know it's rude, Eijun-kun."

"No, don't worry about it. It's not a big deal, really. Just a mishap on a camping trip a couple years ago. I was stupid and stepped on something I shouldn't have is all. Not much to tell, really," Eijun said, and he rubbed the back of his head in a rueful way.

So, it was true, Haruichi realized. Eijun was trying to downplay it, but he had just confirmed the rumor that was going around.

Just as Haruichi had thought, his friend was amazing.

* * *

Wakana passed the list of other ideas she'd come up with to the only other one of her old teammates who shared her homeroom. She was going to let all of them in on the joke, and make sure they were ready to back up her stories if she needed them to, and they were going to check over her ideas and make sure that none of them were too over the top to be believable. Then they'd probably add some ideas of their own to feed Eijun's new teammates. The very thought made Wakana smile evilly.

By the time they graduated, Eijun's silly senpai were going to be convinced that Sawamura Eijun was the next Chuck Norris.

(Reviews are appreciated.)


End file.
